1 Corinthians 12:14-15
“For the body does not consist of one member but of many. If the foot should say, "Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body," that would not make it any less a part of the body.”
1 Corinthians 12:14-15 ESV
There are many times throughout my walk where I've wished I had abilities that I don't have. There are so many things I wish I was better at, but unfortunately that's just not how God created me. Lately, the hardest thing that I've been facing is that I wish I had more courage. That I wouldn't be so afraid of this life that God has for created for me. That I didn't have to be so terrified of this world. I know that having a fear of God is different than Earthly fear but I wish I could be more afraid of God and less afraid of this world. I mean I have the faith in everything that God is doing in my life, but even while having that faith, I'm always filled with such a fear. Whether it's fear of the unknown, fear of the way in which the objective at hand has to be accomplished, fear of myself, fear of those around me, there's always so much fear. At times it's as though I'm fleeing for my life from an encroaching darkness that's already circled me and is devouring my body as I continue to forge ahead, clinging on to my only hope of what appears to be a beacon of light miles off in the distance. I have no idea how far away the beacon is, but all I know is that God is telling me to get there before this darkness consumes me. He's telling me I'll get there, but the light is so far off, it's as if it isn't even there, and the darkness is starting to be so encumbering, it's so burdensome to carry. Now my footsteps are starting to get too heavy for me, and my feet keep slipping in the dark. He keeps telling me I'm going to get there, and I believe him, I truly do, but there's so much darkness, the evil is so overwhelming and lies are forming all around me in the dark, even with his promises I'm still terrified to the core of my soul. And then a ray from heaven bursts out of the sky and falls upon me, and extinguishes all the darkness from my body, buying me time to continue pressing ahead. But eventually the light dies off, and the darkness returns. How does it keep coming back? Is it never ending? At least I have the hope that he's going to keep shining those beams of light into my life, but when will I be able to just fully trust him? When I won't be so worried about and afraid of the things of this world? All I know is that I know I'm going to get to the light, and until then I just have to keep trusting God as best as I can, I just wish I wasn't so afraid. Before righting this I broke down to God asking him, “Why can't I have more courage?” And he told me immediately “because I'm going to use you.” How much glory my life is bringing God, the fact that I can trust him through all this fear. I wish I was a different part of the body, but I know that in being the part I am I am serving him the best way that I possibly could, the way he created me to glorify him. I’m going to share this IBS with my brothers and hopefully we will have an edifying conversation after I read this to them.
1 Corinthians 12:14-15 ESV
There are many times throughout my walk where I've wished I had abilities that I don't have. There are so many things I wish I was better at, but unfortunately that's just not how God created me. Lately, the hardest thing that I've been facing is that I wish I had more courage. That I wouldn't be so afraid of this life that God has for created for me. That I didn't have to be so terrified of this world. I know that having a fear of God is different than Earthly fear but I wish I could be more afraid of God and less afraid of this world. I mean I have the faith in everything that God is doing in my life, but even while having that faith, I'm always filled with such a fear. Whether it's fear of the unknown, fear of the way in which the objective at hand has to be accomplished, fear of myself, fear of those around me, there's always so much fear. At times it's as though I'm fleeing for my life from an encroaching darkness that's already circled me and is devouring my body as I continue to forge ahead, clinging on to my only hope of what appears to be a beacon of light miles off in the distance. I have no idea how far away the beacon is, but all I know is that God is telling me to get there before this darkness consumes me. He's telling me I'll get there, but the light is so far off, it's as if it isn't even there, and the darkness is starting to be so encumbering, it's so burdensome to carry. Now my footsteps are starting to get too heavy for me, and my feet keep slipping in the dark. He keeps telling me I'm going to get there, and I believe him, I truly do, but there's so much darkness, the evil is so overwhelming and lies are forming all around me in the dark, even with his promises I'm still terrified to the core of my soul. And then a ray from heaven bursts out of the sky and falls upon me, and extinguishes all the darkness from my body, buying me time to continue pressing ahead. But eventually the light dies off, and the darkness returns. How does it keep coming back? Is it never ending? At least I have the hope that he's going to keep shining those beams of light into my life, but when will I be able to just fully trust him? When I won't be so worried about and afraid of the things of this world? All I know is that I know I'm going to get to the light, and until then I just have to keep trusting God as best as I can, I just wish I wasn't so afraid. Before righting this I broke down to God asking him, “Why can't I have more courage?” And he told me immediately “because I'm going to use you.” How much glory my life is bringing God, the fact that I can trust him through all this fear. I wish I was a different part of the body, but I know that in being the part I am I am serving him the best way that I possibly could, the way he created me to glorify him. I’m going to share this IBS with my brothers and hopefully we will have an edifying conversation after I read this to them.
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