John 6:60
“Therefore many of His disciples, when they heard this, said, “This is a hard saying; who can understand it?””
John 6:60 NKJV
During my time here in Ignite, I have had many periods of complete spiritual lack of understanding. There had been many challenges that I faced that had challenged my past beliefs, and there were even instances when I was so lost that I felt as if I couldn't even trust my own thoughts because I didn't know if any of them were spiritual right to think. It was a time filled with immense spiritual warfare, and it was very difficult to decipher what was conviction and what was the enemy. It helped me to grow a lot, and I feel like I definitely understand the Spirit’s working in my life tremendously more than I did before, and I'm immensely more confident in my current spiritual situation, especially considering that I finally have stopped questioning my salvation. But it was without a doubt the hardest time spiritually in my life, probably even the most difficult time I've ever experienced in life. The enemy knew this was going to be a time of exceptional growth for me, and he was doing everything he could to keep me from growing. He honestly slowed me down a bit, but I know that I have grown so much since the beginning of training. The reason for this? Even with all the doubt and fear and lack of confidence I had in myself? Because in all of my lack of understanding, I knew that God knew exactly what was happening the whole time. At times I literally didn't know what to believe or even think, other than I knew how much God loved me, and that He was going to grow me no matter what I thought or did. I knew that ultimately the Spirit is man’s teacher, and that he was going to teach me during those three months of training. “But Simon Peter answered Him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.” John 6:68 NKJV. All I did was take everything to God. I had no where else to go, no answer that I knew I could really trust. But all I knew was that I could trust Him. I think I cried out to Him more in Ignite than in my entire life, and He was always there for me, willing to teach me and love on me, even though I didn't deserve His grace. He has made me so reliant on Him and so close to Him, He knew exactly what I needed in training, even if I had no idea at the time what wa going on. And this verse is a great reminder, that when things just don't make sense and I don't understand, that's when I immediately just need to turn to Abba, and trust that He will teach me, like He always does. I have a new compact bible that I've been using mostly during my time here in Uganda. I have written in it at all as a way to encourage me to journal more, which actually has happened me write more during my devotion time. But I'm going to write this verse inside on my first page. Just as a reminder.
John 6:60 NKJV
During my time here in Ignite, I have had many periods of complete spiritual lack of understanding. There had been many challenges that I faced that had challenged my past beliefs, and there were even instances when I was so lost that I felt as if I couldn't even trust my own thoughts because I didn't know if any of them were spiritual right to think. It was a time filled with immense spiritual warfare, and it was very difficult to decipher what was conviction and what was the enemy. It helped me to grow a lot, and I feel like I definitely understand the Spirit’s working in my life tremendously more than I did before, and I'm immensely more confident in my current spiritual situation, especially considering that I finally have stopped questioning my salvation. But it was without a doubt the hardest time spiritually in my life, probably even the most difficult time I've ever experienced in life. The enemy knew this was going to be a time of exceptional growth for me, and he was doing everything he could to keep me from growing. He honestly slowed me down a bit, but I know that I have grown so much since the beginning of training. The reason for this? Even with all the doubt and fear and lack of confidence I had in myself? Because in all of my lack of understanding, I knew that God knew exactly what was happening the whole time. At times I literally didn't know what to believe or even think, other than I knew how much God loved me, and that He was going to grow me no matter what I thought or did. I knew that ultimately the Spirit is man’s teacher, and that he was going to teach me during those three months of training. “But Simon Peter answered Him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.” John 6:68 NKJV. All I did was take everything to God. I had no where else to go, no answer that I knew I could really trust. But all I knew was that I could trust Him. I think I cried out to Him more in Ignite than in my entire life, and He was always there for me, willing to teach me and love on me, even though I didn't deserve His grace. He has made me so reliant on Him and so close to Him, He knew exactly what I needed in training, even if I had no idea at the time what wa going on. And this verse is a great reminder, that when things just don't make sense and I don't understand, that's when I immediately just need to turn to Abba, and trust that He will teach me, like He always does. I have a new compact bible that I've been using mostly during my time here in Uganda. I have written in it at all as a way to encourage me to journal more, which actually has happened me write more during my devotion time. But I'm going to write this verse inside on my first page. Just as a reminder.
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